What is Love?

My goodness, here we are again. You and me in this little corner of the Internet. Hard to believe that it's been yet another month. They just slip by so quietly. Even harder to believe that on March 17, I will have been in England for six months. Just think of it- you've all had six months of peace and quiet. How lovely has that been?! Don't worry, I'll be back and rocking boats again soon enough.

Speaking of time, time out here is so weird. It's almost impossible to tell if time is passing quickly or slowly. On one hand, it feels like just yesterday that I was with all of you. On the other, it feels like I've lived here in Cannock all of my life! When I mention to members how long I've been out, they always ask the same question. "Does it go fast?" The only answer I can give that has really made sense to me is "The days are weeks and the weeks are days." Every day feels like forever. Especially when we're busy. You feel like you've done a weeks worth of stuff in a single day. And then suddenly you're at Sunday again and you think "Wait a minute- didn't I just do this?!" The weeks fly by. It's the strangest thing I've ever experienced. 

  Last month was rough, and to be honest, I got really stressed about it. Nothing was going the way I wanted it to and I kept twisting myself into knot after knot after knot until I couldn't even recognise myself through the knotted mess of my emotions. By the time February hit, it was clear that either something needed to change, or I was going to spontaneously combust.

My hope was to untie the knots neatly, one by one, but I didn't even know where to begin. As I prayed for guidance, I got the subtle impression that it all came down to one thing--I needed to learn how to truly love myself.  Something my mom wrote me in a letter really helped me.  She said that when we're in a tough spot, we can check to see if there's some thing we need to do differently, or something different we need to do, or if we just need to stay strong and ride it out. She shared two scripture verses on charity, the pure love of Christ, and how we can use those descriptions of charity as benchmarks to see how we're doing and where we need to improve. . 

Anyway, there are a lot of ups and downs in life, and sometimes it's hard to see how we are improving, or even that we are improving. Those verses my mom talked about help me to understand where I'm at and where I need to go, and it makes it all look a bit more manageable. Life out here it so centred on improvement. It's awesome, but it can be overwhelming. There's this quote I found that I like by Howard W. Hunter, "Our detours and disappointments are the straight and narrow path to Him." Meaning that as we fail and mess up and have to try again, all of those things are bringing us closer and closer to Christ. I totally agree. 

I have to say, I feel like I've been through the mill this last month, but things are finally picking up. Sister Woolsey and I have hit our stride, and we have begun to be busy. We're having a hard time finding the time to do everything, and it is a fantastic problem to have. I'm loving it.

If you remember way back, Sister Pickett and I started teaching this great guy. He was awesome and we loved him, but he just wasn't progressing for some reason. We found out that his sister was super ill with cancer, and that he was spending a lot of his time and energy there. We thought it best to leave it all be for a while because just like we're always telling people, family is super important. Then, not too long ago, we stopped by his house and he told us that he'd lost his sister and that he'd love for us to come by again. Since then, he has been progressing rapidly. And actually, he came to church for the first time ever just this past Sunday! It is super duper exciting. Really really happy for him. You can see him changing, and it is a beautiful thing to behold.

Also in January sometime, this random couple showed up to church. They talked to Bishop, and apparently the woman is the granddaughter of a home bound member. They told Bishop that they'd like to get married in the chapel, oh and also that they'd like to be baptised as soon as possible. 

Right?! How crazy is that?! They just moved into our area, so we've been able to start teaching them. They are super sweet. They know next to nothing about the gospel, but they know that they like the way they feel when they come to church and they really want to be a part of it. It's very, very exciting. Good things are happening in the glorious ward called Cannock, and I love it here.

One last story to finish. So I had these boots for winter, right? Super cheapo, but they kept the rain out and they kept my legs warm, so they worked. They were actually the second pair of these boots that I'd bought because the others had a zipper that had busted. Anyway, they were good boots. Then, we went out on a drizzly, wet, horrible day, and my feet got wet. I was really confused, because my boots looked fine. There were no cracks on the edges or anything, so when we came in for lunch, I changed my socks and tights, called it a fluke and went back out again. And they got wet again. And not just a little wet. I was squelching up a storm! I felt like I had two little swimming pools chillin in my boots. I was totally baffled. I couldn't understand it. Finally, Sister Woolsey said, "Have you checked the bottom?" So I lifted up my foot, and there you go! There was a huge hole in each heel of my cheap boots. We didn't have time to go back and change, but I couldn't hang around with wet feet, so we went to Asda (basically Walmart) and I bought new shoes and tights and socks which I had to put on in the bathroom there. It was a fun adventure. Oh, the life of a missionary. Anyway, spring is here now, so I just tossed the boots and called it good. 

My main takeaway from this month is that, in order to love other people the way we ought to, we first need to love ourselves. We can't really know what it is to deeply love others until we begin to love ourselves. And not the ideal of the way we want to be, but the way we are at this very minute, right now. When we really try to do that, our ability to love increases, and everything gets better. I'm only beginning this journey for myself, but I can see the massive changes that are taking place in my life. I am a different person to the one I was two weeks ago. Heck, I'm different from the person I was two days ago! But that is what life is all about, and it's awesome. 

Live life and love the ride! Have a good month!

Sister Pike